Palm Desert Recovery Center

Drug Treatment Who Needs it?

Who needs drug treatment? At what point is it time to seek help? Many addicts believe they can stop on their own. Some family members are afraid to approach their loved ones. Is there really a problem? Is it as bad as I think it is? They are going to be so angry with me if I address it with them; what will I say? When is the right time?

Here is the truth about drug addition, if you think it is a problem, it is likely worse than you think. SO, you are on the right track. Next, when is the right time. If you wait, you could regret it – don’t wait. Overdose, takes one time. AND, it is worth the confrontation. If you do nothing, nothing changes. The risk is too great, you must do something.

The question is what do you do? First, you may have noticed some things. Write them down. Changes in behavior, sleeping patterns, disposition, self-care, friends, job loss or loss of ambition, loss of meaningful relationships, legal consequences and other negative outcomes. An interventionist can be needed and helpful to mediate approaching your loved one. However, should you and other family have an opening to discuss treatment, let them know – compassionately what you have seen – without judgement, but rather with concern. Express your fear and love. Ask them to get help.

Invite them to look into resources for treatment that you have researched. Let them know you support them in getting help and that you understand and will be there to help them get into a program.

If they refuse care, be prepared to set boundaries in advance. Know what those boundaries are. Have them written down and express them without anger. I can no longer pay your rent until you get help. I can no longer give you money until you get help. You can no longer live here until you get help. I love you and care about you and am here for you when you are ready to get help. I understand you are not ready. Do not argue. Notice that they might try – it is their addiction and your fear that will engage. It is fruitless.

Call a professional for support. Attend Alanon for you. For more support or an assessment call 760.550.0613

Alcoholism, Addiction: A Family Problem

Alcoholism and Addiction – it can’t be avoided – it’s a tireless family problem. When we have a loved one struggling with addiction or alcoholism it is so hard to watch, it’s hard to know what to do, how to approach it, and how to set boundaries to keep us and other family members safe.

We may question, “is this my fault?” We might not notice how some of our interactions and behavior toward our loved one is enabling their addiction. Be certain that doesn’t mean we are causing them to drink or use drugs, it means there could be other things we could do that could narrow the path to get them to seek help.

Often the best we can do is, or what we think the best we can do is cut them off. And it is true cutting off an alcoholic or addict is a good way to narrow their path to seek recovery if done with love and compassion. Generally, it is important to look at how are we supporting them. Are we afraid to be direct – your drinking and using appears to be increasing and I have noticed that there have been these ______, _____, ______, consequences as a result and I am concerned it will get worse for you and perhaps could even result in the loss of your freedom or life. I am not willing to continue to support you finically in these ways ______, _____, ______, anymore because I feel I am taking away an opportunity for you to be responsible for yourself and it is contributing to your ability to drink or use drugs. However, if you get help I will be here for you in recovery.

Most of the time, the “cutting off” the alcoholic or addict happens in fear and sense of not being able to control or fix the problem and comes out in anger rather than compassion and love. Many addicts and alcoholics need to know the door is closed, but they can call for help when they are ready.

The truth is no matter how they say they don’t they do need their family. Shifting the dysfunctional dynamic takes time and practice. It can start with you and you are not alone there are professionals that can help and support you and your loved on in the process. Call Palm Desert Recovery Center at 760.550.0613.